I'm Not Your Hero
by Clarixe
Summary: Gray has his reason as to why he doesn't want Juvia as a partner in any of his quests. -a short GRUVIA songfic-


**Author's Note**: The italicized stanzas are actually from Tegan and Sara's "I'm Not Your Hero." The song was actually the inspiration for this short fanfiction. I just felt that this really suits Juvia Lockser. I hope you enjoy this fic. Constructive criticisms are much appreciated. Thank you very much.

**I'm Not Your Hero**

* * *

"I could have finished the job earlier," Gray Fullbuster, the ice mage of Fairy Tail, sighed as he walked down a street in Magnolia. His hands were on his pocket as he strode the road casually.

Behind him, Juvia Lockser, a previous S-class member of Phantom Lord Guild but now a loyal water mage of Fairy Tail, followed him closely. She was wearing the usual dark blue dress coat. On top of her dress coat was a muffler with white fur trimmings. She shyly answered, "Juvia wants to say sorry to Gray-sama."

"Don't every do that again," Gray seemed pissed off. He was referring to their earlier job wherein Juvia jumped off in front of Gray to protect him from the void blast of the enemy.

"But –"

"You didn't even know how deadly he was," Gray intercepted, "you could have been killed."

"Juvia is sorry," the water mage shyly answered.

"I already told Mirajane that I'm used to doing requests alone," he muttered under his breath.

Juvia heard it. Her eyes narrowed, "Juvia only wants to be with you, Gray-sama."

They continued to walk. The sky was already a mural of orange and white. The sun was about to set. Random people would look at them with pride as the two are one of the popular members of the guild.

Gray sighed as his pace of walking went faster, "I prefer to do things on my own, Juvia."

"Juvia knows," The cerulean-haired mage answered as she almost ran to catch up with the ice mage, "but Mirajane told me that the mission is difficult to do alone."

"You don't always have to believe her," the ice maker answered as he looked at the sky again – the orange and white swirls were turning gray, "she should have sent someone else."

"What do you mean?"

"I would prefer Natsu or Erza instead," Gray answered bluntly.

Juvia remained silent for a while. Her hands were already clutching the hems of her sleeves. She suddenly had hard time breathing – as if a stone was placed on her heart. She felt the sudden urge to cry and be angry.

The crowd depleted. They arrived to the point that the only people on the street were the two of them – the ice and water.

As they were about to cross a concrete bridge, Juvia asked, "is it because they are stronger than Juvia?"

"It's not that," The raven-haired man stuttered without looking at her. Drizzles started to drop from the dark clouds above them.

Tears were already welling up from her eyes. She could feel the heat on her cheeks. The cold feeling of the rain droplets on her skin was a contrast to the heat that she felt within.

Juvia stopped in the middle of the bridge. She wanted to go back. She wanted to be somewhere else. She wiped the water from her eyes before it even hit her cheeks.

She said in a low voice, "sometimes, Juvia doesn't know why Gray-sama is harsh towards her."

Juvia tried to breathe deeply as she tried to control her emotions but the tears won't stop. The feeling of rejection – it was something familiar to her. She looked back to her past - the feeling of rejection from her childhood, from other men and from other people. It was a feeling familiar to her yet she wondered how come every time she was being rejected, it's as if the emotion was raw. It's as if she had felt it for the first time. It was always like that every time.

"I don't mean to make you feel bad," Gray muttered. He stopped. Still without looking at her, he replied, "I'm sorry."

Both of them were already soaked due to the rain. Though coldness had already permeated through their clothes, they remained still on the bridge as both of them were already used to coldness. It was both figuratively and literally.

"Is it because Juvia is weak?"

He shook his head, "on the contrary, I think you're strong."

"Juvia doesn't understand," she said with a frown.

"Juvia, do you know what happened to my master, Ul?" Gray asked, "losing someone you really love – it is the hardest feeling ever."

The water mage continued to frown. She did not understand the connection of Ul's death to the current issue.

"It's something that I do not want to feel anymore," Gray added as he looked at her. The two pairs of dark blue eyes met – his and hers, "not again."

Juvia stopped crying and remained silent. Her lips parted a little as she tried to comprehend everything. She did not understand a thing; she frowned again.

"You will understand it," Gray approached her as he took off his white coat, "someday."

He placed over the head of the water mage and said, "you might catch a cold."

She chuckled, "Juvia is water, silly."

"Right," he laughed as he started walking again. The rain was still pouring hard.

Juvia did not understand what Gray Fullbuster said – whether it is a compliment or not. She thought, "maybe someday, Gray-sama, I will understand it."

**fin**


End file.
